"...as someone once imagined it."

I am still working on my dissection of the human brain. I want to properly articulate everything that has become apparent on that frontier, especially after looking at “The Brain Book” by Rita Carter. Yes, I was the dork who meandered into the reference section at Borders and loved every second of it as I sat cross-legged on the industrial carpeting. Those revelations will come soon enough.. but this is now.

***

So, the other night I got out of work at “Job 2.” It was a little chilly, but the winds had subsided and the city lights were burning brightly. It felt like a night to be out, even if doing nothing at all. Spontaneity kicked in, and I maneuvered the streets away from my normal wrought home. I followed the skyline in hopes of reaching one of the taller buildings. I really just wanted to be on top of the world, and look down at everything, breathing in that cool night air.

Unfortunately, I was unable to convince the security guards of any of the lofty buildings to let me up to the top floor, let alone the roof (partially because it was so late, partially because they probably thought I was suicidal), so I didn’t get to look down at my coruscating city. It did remind me of a book though. There is a scene in “Paper Towns,” by John Green where the main characters go up to the top of a corporate skyscraper and look down at the town, much in the way I had so wanted to do.

“It’s more impressive...from a distance I mean. You can’t see the rust or the weeds or the paint cracking. You see the place as someone once imagined it.”
“Everything’s uglier up close.” she said.

I hadn’t been able to remember the exact quote as I walked along toward my next destination of the night, but I embraced the mood of it. I looked around the city, and saw people who were still in the streets at that late hour. It was easy to see their trendy clothing, piercings, and their slightly liquor induced swaying steps. But I wondered hypothetically about their skeletons that I couldn’t see from the outside.. If there were emotional scars that sullied their minds.. if they actually had opinions on the many political and environmental complications that are occurring as of late.. if they were just more comfortable living in their name-brand oblivion.. had they imagined themselves being where they were that very night, looking the way they did, years before...or expect things to stay the same in the future- Does it even matter?

To everyone else in the world, my problems and experiences look like invisible dust... maybe they are. Maybe yours are. Maybe everyone needs to take a chill pill and step down from their pedestals for a day, and check their attitudes and artillery at the door as they continue to stumble along the sidewalks- the same sidewalks I’ve literally seen stained in homeless blood and littered with trash.

I don’t even know where this entry is going anymore. But in an case... have a wonderful day, night, and let me know if there is a precipice from which I can gaze.